Tag Archives: virgin

willingly subjecting myself to genital herpes

The title of the post is the exact statement of a friend of mine. Once a virgin, twice a herpes magnet. I’m pretty (and very) conservative. I am a late bloomer, never doing anything dirty in high school.

Paraphrasing what my anonymous friend says:

Being sexually active involves willingly subjecting myself to genital herpes. I had no idea whether they were disease-free unless I had hard evidence. I had to trust that they were tested or inactive. I didn’t have anything to worry about myself. I’d say it ain’t worth it though. Sex isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, even with a whip. It’s fun for the 10 minutes it lasts. All my girlfriends faking almost all their orgasms proves my point.

Some people just enjoy diseases. Look at all the people ready and raring to plop man flesh in their mouth, or to slip into a hole full of s*#t. It’s very possible that these adventurous souls want to experience first-hand what it’s like. They are like scientists donating their bodies to science before their demise. I gotta give them credit. That’s a sacrifice to breakout in rash or any other atrocity for the good of all mankind… so determined.

The Flaming Lips never would have thought that I could link that song with venereal disease. Boo YAH!111!!! (ONES added for internet emphasis)


Myspace is a garden of spam and pornography that would make anyone bulimic. I feel like strangling somebody I’m so enraged at the condition of my world. For instance, take a message like this:

i usually hate spam but my friend sent me this vaginal rejuvenation system and it actually works. you get 10 skin tightenings and the feeling is sick! check it out:


i got new genital sensations, i’m a virgin again, and my husband thinks I’m a young woman again!!
lemme know if u like it

I think that spam increases the suicide rate, and it sure as hell pisses me off when a supposedly true friend of mine on myspace tries to hustle me for some phat ringtonez. I’m smart enough to know that my friend isn’t that shallow and won’t send random shit my direction unless its golden shit. Maybe I’m listening to too much raw and hard punk of early ‘Mats.