Tag Archives: spam

how can i get pregnant quickly?

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A spam has asked “how can i get pregnant quickly?”

-frequent intercourse
-take off the condom
-Haven’t tried speed sex
-timely orgasm
-inject the sperm directly into the uterus?

None of these work if you are sterile or happen to be a computer program.

I’d like to ask the spam, Are you looking to shorten the time until childbirth? You could try traveling close to the speed of light to make time pass relative to the rest of the world. Or you could deliver it prematurely, having a pre-child resembling the baby in Eraserhead.

artn31_lynch_eraserhead.jpg

I wonder if growth hormones would speed up development of the child?

revirginization

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Myspace is a garden of spam and pornography that would make anyone bulimic. I feel like strangling somebody I’m so enraged at the condition of my world. For instance, take a message like this:

i usually hate spam but my friend sent me this vaginal rejuvenation system and it actually works. you get 10 skin tightenings and the feeling is sick! check it out:

censoredrevirginizations.com

i got new genital sensations, i’m a virgin again, and my husband thinks I’m a young woman again!!
lemme know if u like it

I think that spam increases the suicide rate, and it sure as hell pisses me off when a supposedly true friend of mine on myspace tries to hustle me for some phat ringtonez. I’m smart enough to know that my friend isn’t that shallow and won’t send random shit my direction unless its golden shit. Maybe I’m listening to too much raw and hard punk of early ‘Mats.